Change & New Habits

You can't always change the circumstances in life, but you can choose how you respond to them. You always have a choice. You might not be able to make the choices you want given the circumstances, but you can do things to make the circumstances to not seem so bad. Thats where I am at in life.

It's really difficult living with a house full of people when you have 2 toddlers. Going from our own place to our own routine and our own stuff to somebody else's is big adjustment for us as adults. It's an even bigger adjustment for the kids. We still haven't been able to completely settle in. Sadly, I'm not sure that we will. Joshua knows the difference between our house and our stuff and my in laws house and their stuff. I show him pictures of our old apartment and he recognizes that as home. He recently started calling my in laws home "home" when we watch the videos I put on YouTube but, he still recognizes our couch and dining room table and his bedroom furniture from the pictures of our old apartment. I know this is just a season but as a mom I want my babies to have everything they could possibly need to feel like it is THEIR home and THEIR space. I want to create my own home and home environment for my kids. I love my family and in laws. I love the home and environment that they have created here. It is loving, welcoming, friendly, fun and comfortable. It's just not mine. Thats the hardest part for me. I feel like I can't provide for my kids how I want to because I'm not in my own place and able to create my own home. So, if I can't change these circumstances (which I can't because there is NO WAY we can afford rent while Patrick is in school) I have to start changing how I respond to these circumstances and start creating better and healthier habits.

I am choosing to have a different perspective. To be thankful and grateful throughout the day. Even in the hard moments. Even when the kids are screaming, acting up, not listening, etc. to be thankful that they are healthy kids that they are growing and learning. Learning how to behave and how to act. To be grateful that I have this gift of Motherhood and that I get to teach them so much about life and how to live it and make the best of it! This perspective helps me calm down and get through the rough days at home. I am also adjusting my expectations. My expectations from the kids, my husband and the household. So that I am not getting frustrated when something doesn't turn out how I thought it would have due to my expectations. That has been HUGE for me and has really helped with not feeling so frustrated all the time. I'm still learning as I go and when I find negative things or things that weigh be down. I evaluate how I can change my response to them. But, those are the main 2 things that I can do to respond differently to the circumstances.

I've never been a habitual person but I find that when I stay consistent with healthy habits I feel better. Mentally and emotionally. I constantly desire to work out. Not just to get back into shape but because I have a bad back and working out helps with my back pain. I struggle with finding time to do that. I can't afford a gym membership and I have 2 toddlers so I can just have a babysitter come over 4-5 days a week so that I can work out. I am making it a priority to fit in a at home workout (using the Nike Training Center app --HIGHLY recommend it!-- ) So today, I gave it a shot. As soon as I put Annabelle down for her morning nap I brought out my foam roller and stretched out then started my workout. They are usually under 30 min. Then I have simplified my getting ready routine so that I can put a little bit of make up on and do something decent with my hair in 20 min. That gives me an entire to workout AND get ready for the day. Joshua likes to join me on some of the workouts or just climb on me like cats do when you do Yoga. It was cute at first but then got really difficult. We are working on teaching him personal space with people so this is a great way to do it! I finished the workout, got ready, made Joshua lunch and got Annabelle's lunch ready and got the house picked up all in the hour and a half or so that she took her nap. It felt GREAT to have all that done plus a few loads of laundry by 2pm. In addition to the working out a few times a week, I would like to start waking up at 6 to have alone time in the morning before the kids wake up. However, I find myself shutting that alarm off often and staying in bed. Some nights I don't sleep well because I wake up several times with Annabelle or get to bed too late and need that extra 1-1.5 hr of sleep. Im still working on just pushing through the tiredness and waking up anyways regardless if I am tired. Also, making sure I get to bed by 9-9:30 is something I'm trying to do so that I get more sleep to be able to wake up at 6am.

With all that said, I am hoping that I start seeing a difference in my moods and my happiness with these changes and new habits.